Remembering our Mothers...

Mother died three years ago today.  My high school--and still close friends--Elaine and Donna and I packed a picnic and headed into the mountains for a time to celebrate our mothers.  We shared stories--of times they embarrassed us, and more often, we embarrassed them.  And we each thought of tales that the others didn't recall. 

We talked of ways we are very much like our mothers.  We spoke of characteristics we hoped we didn't inherit.  Since our mothers knew all three of us AND one another, there was little ever hidden.  And perhaps that's part of what made today so much fun!

Donna and Elaine's mothers had proper funeral/memorial services, but there was none for my mother--that's the way she wanted it.  Now, three years later, I'm happy to have friends willing to take this time for a ceremony of remembrance.

"Mother, you've been in my thoughts most of this day.  

I still miss you like crazy."   

Ten Years of Change...

Yesterday I celebrated a ten-year anniversary.  I've never regretted the decision that resulted in this milepost.  So to recognize the occasion, I had lunch at a lovely Italian hideaway with a special friend, a bit of retail therapy, and a relaxing evening with Gilly, and my journal--my  self-reflecting tool.

Support of family and friends made the transition to independent living less painful.  I continued teaching for a couple of years, then retired and relocated some 500+ miles southwest.  A good choice!  I reconnected with old friends.  I continue making new friends.  I take classes for intellectual stimulation--I've heard the brain implodes without proper use.  Weekly English/Scottish dancing of the Jane Austen variety transports me to a long ago era--minus Mr. Darcy unfortunately.  Exercise invigorates my body with energy and health.  Volunteer work enables me to give back.

In the last 10 years, I've also spent many hours alone.  Time unattended by another, in the privacy of my own home, I meet myself--my real, no-mask-worn--where-the-rubber-meets-the-road self.  And guess what?  I kinda love my pardner in crime...ME.  No shame or guilt haunt my thoughts.  Nor does any need for perfection.  Consistently, however, is the ongoing desire to live intentionally with integrity and compassion.

And that is why I can celebrate this 10 year anniversary with such joy!

 I wanted to change the world.

But I have found that the only thing 

one can be sure of changing is oneself.

            --- Aldous Huxley